"he’s 24 months old" bitch your son is two
My idea of flirting is making fun of each other until one of us fucks up and says something nice.
i wonder if anyone has ever peed in the olympic pool
(Source: nardvvuar, via unescapable)
*eats 1,000 oranges* its fruit i won’t gain weight
hard to be mad when I have nice dreams
im very strong, just like an ant. ants can lift 10 times their own weight. I can also lift 10 times an ant’s weight